I have had to figure out who I am without my other half

June 22, 2017
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I have had to figure out who I am without my other half

I have had to figure out who I am without my other half

“We are competing in the boat race as SS John Mac in honor of my late husband John McCafferty. He passed away last August with gallbladder cancer. He was diagnosed at age 41, which is relatively rare. He fought it for 21 months with surgery, radiation, chemo and trips to MD Anderson. The team racing with us has some sort of connection with me or John through my fitness class or church, friends from high school. John and I were high school sweethearts and met in 9th grade, we were together since 1989. He was the love of my life. My church support has been phenomenal and I get through every day with the grace and support of Jesus Christ. I started kickboxing in February of last year and John encouraged me to do that. Kickboxing is a great way to get out anger and aggression. The first class I went to, I almost started crying because I imagined cancer was the bag. I just started taekwondo a month ago. I do mud races, too. Going through this has made me more sensitive and compassionate. We have a son, Aden, who was 8 when John died. He said he would rather have John for 8 years the way he was than have him forever and he not be a good daddy. Out on the water during the first boat race today, I was overcome thinking of him and cried. Before I start a race, I always blow a kiss to the sky for him. I think about him all of the time. This race has helped me with my own grief, but also a way to honor him, he was a good husband and a good father. He was kind and sensitive and never met a stranger. He worked hard even though he was in constant pain from other issues besides cancer. He can’t live anymore, but Aden and I are still here and he can live on through us. I want to have as many experiences as I can. Since his death, I have been less anxious and am more open to new things and more brave and courageous. We were together since we were 13 and I am going to be 43 this year. I have had to figure out who I am without my other half.”

2 comments on “I have had to figure out who I am without my other half”

  1. Kelly says:

    Love you so much Marie ! I am so proud of you and your perseverance. I know that part of that is God’s sustaining grace . Just like the tomb was a transition to Jesus , the grave is a transition to a new beginning and not the end . Glory to God in the highest for making that possible for us all!

  2. Kelly says:

    Your story and your son’s comments are very touching. I pray that you will continue to acquire strength through the things you do to honor the memory of your husband.

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