I am a sit-down comedian. I like to make people smile

March 21, 2021

“I grew up in Fairhope. My family has been here for generations. They call me Dash because my name is Douglas Ash. I have been all over the world but I came back because we have the prettiest women in the world. You have heard of a stand-up comedian. I am a sit-down comedian. I like to make people smile. If you can’t dazzle them with your charm, hit them with your bullshit.

I have been in a wheelchair for more than 40 years. I was stabbed in the back when I was 22 years old. I stopped in Austin, Texas and gave a white girl a ride home from work because her car broke down. We started talking. After I dropped her off, her boyfriend followed me to the beach. I got out and went to the bathroom. I came out and he stabbed me three times. Twice in the back and once in the back of the head. After he stabbed me, he realized he misunderstood. I was just helping her because the motor burned up in her car.

I got into drugs for a lot of years. I have had two brain surgeries. I am not supposed to know my name. I have an aneurysm on my brain. They told me if I have another surgery and live through it I will be blind. I am already crippled and crazy. I don’t need to be blind, crippled and crazy.
I let drugs go and turned it off like a light switch. I gave it to God. He is good all of the time. When you give things to God, He will soothe your mind. I don’t care what problem you have, God will take care of it.

I couldn’t read until I was 35 years old. No one knew. I built houses and was a welder. My ex-wife didn’t know. I told her you never noticed you didn’t get love letters in school. She said you were so smooth that you didn’t need them. I was smooth and hid it. I learned how to read by reading the Bible.

My wife and I are divorced. She checks on me every other day. She is still the love of my life, but I won’t get married again. I did my 30 years and got out on bad behavior. I promised the warden I wasn’t going back. My two daughters are doctors. One is a doctor of education and the other is an anesthesiologist. I am proud of them and they take care of me. They made sure I saw the world.

I do small engine repair. Lawnmowers, chainsaws, wheelchairs, I can repair anything. I am honest with people and fair with my prices. I also make jewelry.

I am always in pain. I am in pain right now, but I don’t take anything. I pushed the chair to Point Clear and back today. I have pushed the chair 25 miles in one day. I have a chance to meet more people and share smiles and God from this chair instead of my electric chair.

I am 63 years old the hard way. I have seven grandkids and life is good. I missed a lot, but I wouldn’t trade my life with anybody.”

3 Comments

  1. Suzanne Douglas

    Wow your words touched my heart & soul.

    Reply
  2. Kim

    We met you May 28th at the ice cream shop in Fairhope. You brightened our day and touched our hearts! May God bless and keep you Dash!

    Reply
  3. Kay

    I took care of you in the hospital. Thank you for the laughs. It was a pleasure meeting you. Take care of yourself.

    Reply

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