“I turned 44 today. Back in 2020, I almost lost my life to multiple pulmonary embolisms. I had clots in both lungs and a large clot from my right ankle to my right knee. My son and mother rushed me to the hospital, and the first thing I was told was, ‘We are not sure if you’re going to make it.’

The only thing on my mind was making sure my children knew I loved them and being at peace with whatever God’s will would be.

I called my son, Axton, who was outside waiting in the parking lot of the Thomas Hospital Standing Emergency Department in Spanish Fort. I told him what was going on. I said, ‘I love you, Aj. Make sure you, your brother and sister take care of one another.’

He called his sister at Daphne High, and I called my oldest son, E’myis. He drove straight to the hospital. As he was driving, I told him I loved him and to make sure they stayed connected and took care of one another.

My daughter McKenzie called to say she was outside with Axton. She told me she loved me. I told her I loved her more and needed her to take care of her brothers.

Because of Covid-19, they couldn’t be at my bedside, but I was at peace knowing they were near. I tell my children I love them every day, sometimes multiple times a day, but that day it was imperative.

My lungs were filling with clots, and the pain was excruciating. I was out of breath but pushed through to pray. I said, ‘Lord, thank you for allowing me to tell my children I love them. You are the only one who knows the outcome. Whichever direction you take me in, I’m ready. Let your will be done. Amen.’

After weeks and months of recovery and therapy, I had time to reflect. Before the hospital, my objective was to give God His time, work hard, and take care of my responsibilities as a single mother. I was an A-class welder at a local shipyard. If the doors were open, I was there. I didn’t have financial support and wasn’t looking for it. I kept a chip on my shoulder so I would push through whatever the obstacle was—100-degree weather, 17-degree weather, attitudes, racism, unfairness, children being kids. Once I flipped my shield down, I had a mission to accomplish.

A coworker once told me, ‘You need to give your body a rest. You can’t do it all in one day. Rome wasn’t built in a day.’ But feeling the need to prove a point to everyone I thought was waiting for me to fail would not let me stop. I kept pushing.

Now I understand there are only two options: voluntary and involuntary. Some days, I wonder if I had voluntarily given my body a break, maybe it wouldn’t have given out on me. I couldn’t walk three feet without getting out of breath. I could hardly stand. I couldn’t drive, cook, or clean. My kids were taking care of me.

There was therapy and injections because they couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t walk without pain. There were challenges from medications, weight changes, more diagnoses, my body rejecting different processes, but those things were not my focus. I knew I would slowly conquer those milestones.

My focus was on making everlasting memories with my children. I finally got that back.

I started planning my birthday. I’m grateful for every birthday God blesses me with. I’m proud to tell people my age and my story. This year I planned to celebrate at the Joe Cain parade. I wanted everyone who saw me to know a Queen was born today. I wanted my four children—24, 21, 20, and 2—along with my daughter-in-law and grandson, involved.

I searched for T-shirts that said, ‘It’s my mom’s birthday.’ I found something sassy and elegant for me. I added a crown, makeup, jewelry, and gold statement boots. Mission accomplished.

I stood out as far as the eye could see. Even if everyone didn’t wish me a happy birthday, they read the pure white sequin dress that said ‘Birthday Queen’ in bold gold and gave me a smile. At that moment, I decided this would be my traditional birthday outfit.

I’m celebrating myself on my birthday and every day, because I deserve it. I can relate to the Book of Job. I have been reminded that I am Job. My story runs deep with pain, but it runs deeper with grace and triumph. I’m grateful for all of it.”

TaKarra